Facebook Manners

Times have changed people used to wake up and read newspapers, now people wake up with FB and go to bed saying goodnight on FB. This addiction has become a great time killer for all age groups.

It is a fun and useful tool to build up relationships and stay connected with friends and family. But there are some unsaid rules which are highlighted below:

Quality and not quantity:

It is not a rat race to see who can get the highest number of friends. Set up your mind as to which type of friends you need; either school mates, college mates or relatives. Do you really want them? Please note if you are perfectly okay with them or if they are not in line with your thinking, ignore them and don’t hesitate.

Personal message:

It is a great place to reconnect with old friends. Do send a message before inviting a friend to FB, as leaving a personal message is a friendly and respectful thing to do.

Selection of photos:

When you add your photographs, you select only your favorite snaps. Kindly do the same when you upload a friend’s photo too because the photos you post on FB will be instantly available to hundreds of people to see. So ask permission before you display the photographs of others. If not, at least be thoughtful enough to consider a good picture. If someone is in their bathing suit or it’s a crazy party scene or if they look bigger than they really are then please don’t publish it.  

Simply simple LIKE

It is a good feeling to share the exciting moments in ones life with friends and family through photographs or a post. Be cool enough to bring a smile on the person’s face by just clicking on “like”; it’s that simple.

A fast checklist

Ø  Don’t get someone who can’t handle internet humor.

Ø  Don’t change your relationship status without consulting the other person.

Ø  Smart conversation is needed whether you are married, single, young or old.

Ø  Don’t steal other people’s friends.

Ø  Don’t start hate group.

Ø  Share and enjoy.

Ø  Be discreet when posting message in another person’s wall

Ø  FB is slowly kills personal life, so learn where to draw the line.

Ø  If one goes through some ugly experience on FB, always remember “I don’t even know him/her”…won’t stand up because we always have a choice in accepting a friend invite, right?

Ø  Appreciation is very important that shows your character towards other people, a few words: ‘thank you’ and ‘likes’ doesn’t cost anything but remember you can bring smiles on faces.

Ø  If someone has sent you a message; be polite enough to reply back.

Ø  Wishing on their birthday or any other special occasion is a wonderful way to keep in touch.

Ø  Stupidity or jealousy can break a relationship.

Face Book has allowed us to share our lives, beliefs, problems with the people we know and love. It is also helps us create our own identity; the best part is we are just a click away from people that we have not met for years.

Mama

 “It’s a transparent world, be yourself”

Understanding your Partner

Falling in love is always magical. When in love we feel it will last forever. We naively believe that somehow we are exempted from the problems that other couples face and we are destined to live happily ever after. But as the magic recedes and daily life takes over,   women expect  men to feel and behave like women, and men expect women to think and react  like men. Without a clear awareness of our differences, we do not take time to understand and respect each other. We become demanding, resentful, judgmental and intolerant.

With the best and most loving intentions, love continues to die. Somehow the problems creep in, the resentments build. Communications break down, mistrust increases. The magic of love is lost.

To keep the magic going, it’s important to learn, understand and accept the differences as MEN and WOMEN.

Importance of listening

A woman just wants to share her feelings about her day, whereas her husband, thinking he is helping, interrupts her by offering a steady flow of solutions to her problems. Men should simply listen patiently with empathy, seeking truly to understand the other’s feelings.

Problem solving

Men feel better solving their problems alone. Women should understand and respect this. They hate being pitied.

Advice

A woman needs to remember that unsolicited advice or criticism especially when he has made a mistake it makes him feel unloved and controlled. He feels that she is treating him like a child.

Heated argument

Men should never walk out in middle of an argument. If so, women feel rejected and lonely, because silence is interpreted by women as being left out alone.  Whereas simple gestures by men like -touching, holding and listening are very important factors for women.

Communicate without blame

When a woman complains, a man takes it as blame. Many men fail to understand that women need to share “upset” feelings with the people they love. A woman usually expresses her feelings in superlatives and generalizations e.g.: “we never go out” -this may not be true in reality. ` 

Motivation

A man’s deepest fear is that he isn’t good enough. But when he feels appreciated, trusted and accepted he feels motivated to give in more in a relationship. Women are happy when they believe their needs will be met.

MAMA

“Little changes can be made without sacrificing who we are”.  This is the secret for a beautiful relationship. 

A BEAUTIFUL BRIDE

This blog is dedicated to Pearl & Ramee

 Wedding represents the most important event in the life of every girl. So it is quiet           natural that the bride wants to look her best on her wedding day.

 When you look at your photographs of your wedding, you want to see that your true beauty is captured in the most natural way. It is important your make-up looks absolutely the best and the skin should look flawless on your big day. Whether your marriage is taking place at noon or evening. The makeup should enhance your beauty not to hide it.

 Here are a few tips to look natural at the same time flawless. 

·        To look good on your photographs, the make up foundation should be completely matte; wear the correct shade of foundation. The color should blend well (look like it disappeared). Brides usually prefer a little color; so choose pastel colors to look soft and pretty.

·        Use matte eye shadow they don’t look shiny and try to avoid glitter, shimmer and frosted eye-shadow. Use an off white matte shadow on your brow bone if you have a light skin and peach if you are dark skinned.

·        Define your brows with a pencil that matches your hair color. Wear at least two layers of mascara, buy new mascara for your wedding day, but test it before the wedding day if it is new brand.

·        Use an eyelashes curler before and after applying first coat of mascara. Wear false eyelashes only if you are very comfortable with it. It’s the same with colored contact lenses.

·        Facial should be done one week prior to your wedding.

·        Don’t get too much sun before your wedding, sunburn, peeling of shin and

tan can sabotage your special day.

·        Eyebrows should be shaped 5-6days before the wedding, be sure not to pluck on your wedding day because you may land up with red bumps that are difficult to cover.

·        Blend your make up well, especially at the corner of your eyes since the camera picks up visible lines, you don’t need extra makeup to please the camera.

·        Choose a lipstick that lasts; be sure to check that you don’t have lipstick on your teeth. Use a lip liner of the same color of your lipstick. Apply light layer of powder over your lips, and then re-apply another coat of lipstick for it to stay for a longer period.

·        If you are doing your own makeup use regular brands of cosmetics and purchase makeup one month in advance, then practice until you have got the perfect makeup. (don’t forget to click pictures and assess yourself)

·        Some women assume that they won’t cry on their wedding day, waterproof mascara is great idea just to increase your weepy. Water proof foundation looks more natural in photos.

·        For pale complexion you should not use vibrant colors, olive complexion should avoid using grey shades.

·        A very little application of facial powder will set your makeup to hold on fresh for longer period.

·        If you discover a pimple on your wedding day do not squeeze just apply cream and get the red out. Cover it with a Concealer and apply foundation.

·        If you need to make  your eyes brighter and wider, use a white pencil to line the inside of your lower eye lid, do not use white or black eye shadow.

Bridal skin care

In order to look great on your day; pre wedding skin care is vitally important. Leave all your worries aside! And focus on your skin, Remember you are going to be under a spotlight with a photographer taking your pictures from all the possible angles.

Few easy bridal skin care tips

·        A month in advance; it is advisable to undertake light exercise on a regular basis.   Apart from keeping you in shape, it will improve the blood circulation for a glowing skin.

·        Drinking lots of water will also flush out impurities from the skin.

·        Maintain healthy food habits with regular intervals.

·        Follow a diet which is full of vitamins and nutrients

·        Avoid stress and anxiety.

·        Get as much sleep as possible in the night before the big day. (Though it is very difficult: D )

·        Avoid junk food and high calorie food

·        Make sure your  wedding photographer is using a high quality film

·        Stay happy and keep on smiling.

And most importantly DON’T forget how gorgeous you are!     

         

Mama

(“Makeover” November issue 2010 will also be very beneficial for makeup tips)

PARENTING OF TEENS

Teenagers have grown completely different compared to 10 years ago. Many parents describe teenagers as if they were a different species, forgetting that they too were at this stage, before. It is true, handling the teens, is one of the toughest skill for the parents.  The growing stage of a child is very delicate time in every parent’s lives.

When teen talks to you listen to them first, make sure you pay attention to what he/she is saying and don’t put down his/her thoughts and beliefs.  Sympathize with your child, if your teenager comfortable with hug and kisses, tell them how much you love them.

The dynamics between you and your son/daughter is changing so quickly, it is challenging to stay focused. You have to be effective parent and role model to your children.

Ask about his/her friends, their interests and suggestions; you can even seek their opinion. Have common interest with your teens, and try to build them up. Show your teens that he/she can have fun and relax with you, discus the issue like dating, drugs and school.

Talk about some of the mistakes you made while growing up. Show your teenager that you too are not perfect, either.  Spend some quality time together; refrain from giving them advice, unless your child specifically asks for it. Be there for your teens; even attend to any athletic event or any informative fairs.

Build up strong relationship be patient allow them to grow up at their own space and own time. Teens that are close to their parents often have high self esteem. Try your level   best GOOD RELATION with your teen’s means that you can be their friend, their parent and their confident.

You can listen to their deepest secret, Want your teens to be trust worthy, responsible and compensate?  Make sure you are molding that clause   from your own life.  Praises, where it deserves, shows that you have noticed their efforts. It also promotes the feeling of competency; show your love, eating dinner together every night, sharing the incident of the day will be very helpful. This builds up interaction between the family members, which leads to the healthy and strong relationship.

Another main responsibility of the parent to make their children goal oriented. Teenage children have lot of energy, high emotional level and a mind which can easily be distracted. Therefore, the parents should make sure that they give direction to the minds of the children, and make them remain focus on their goal. Planning for their future is more important rather than just hanging out with the friends and partying.

Working parents need to see this problem more critically; the parents should not forget that their children need them and their attention more than materialistic luxuries. If the parents are more involved in their work, children start to find their parent in the internet and other technology sources, the communication between the child parents minimize just for asking for money from the parent. Parents need to understand they must   give ‘quality time’ to their family.

 When our children reach puberty our lives change dramatically. Our cute, cuddly children suddenly become moody, rebellious teenagers. We parents often feel left alone and helpless for them, as it is a time of great confusion and fear.

With good counseling individual can build up a healthy loving relationship while still affording them a healthy independence. That will carry them through to a perfect adult-hood.


MAMA


COMMUNICATION IS A KEY IN EVERY TYPE OF RELATIONSHIP

A CHALLENGE, WOMEN SHOULDN’T GIVE UP

 ‘Men- o-pause’   may be a funny play on words, but it is no laughing matter to millions of women. Menopause is an important time in women’s life. Age and Menopause seems to be going hand in hand. A time when her menstrual periods come to an end, there it starts an important phase of ageing process which is quiet natural.

Menopause is major life change and it can bring on lot of weird symptoms due to the extreme level of hormone fluctuations. A woman approaches menopause the warning sign that set in irregular periods, night sweats, disorientation (mental confusion) blotting and hot flushes. The most common sign of menopause is weight gain, hot flushes, depression and sleeplessness.

Some reports are said that only 50 percent of people get menopause symptoms. Hot flushes and lack of concentration are widely associated with it. Also, it has sign that show of mood swings that are very common during this period.

Headaches due to menopause add significant inconvenience and it is believed that women suffer from migraine, although intensity of this headache decreases with the age. It is important to look into its causes and possible remedies.   

The other menopause symptoms that more people are familiar include night sweats, vaginal dryness and itching. One scary thing when it comes to health and wellness during menopause that some women may experience is partial memory loss. Initially you may feel like you’re losing your mind. Sex drive may either increases or decreases.

Clearly if it is causing you problems, you should consult a doctor for a through check-up, just to be sure.

Another symptom is dry skin. There are number of treatments available to ease the symptoms of menopause. It helps you to naturally reduce the symptoms, for example to keep a healthy balance diet and taking vitamin supplements, as advised by the doctor.

There are very few women experiencing menopause, in their early stages. It can occur anytime between 45 yrs.  & 55 yrs., though, there are instances where it sets in during late 30’s and 40’s too. Menopause brings with it the symptoms and conditions that vary from woman to woman.

It is must be understood that when experiencing menopause effects, that these are not life threatening alignments.

TIPS FOR MENOPUSE RELIEF

Don’t forget your clean & healthy lifestyle can help to improve, the negative aspects of menopause. Regular exercise really reduces the hot flushes and restores good & sound sleep.

Mind & body relaxing techniques, such as yoga, breathing exercises, massage therapy, are also popular among menopausal women.

Another important thing that should be kept in mind while dealing with menopausal migraine is that one should maintain & develop a positive approach in handling these headaches.

Keeping check on your stress level and adequate rest is vital.

The intake of whole grain such as rice, barley, maize, wheat -which can be taken in boiled, stewed or in soup form; it is essentials to add fresh vegetables and fruits in your diet. The leafy vegetables contain lot of vitamins- A and C.

Dark chocolates – yes ladies, it is wonderful gift to women as it is full of antioxidants and nutrients.

Stay cool, keep cold drink handy & sip it frequently. Run the air conditioner or open the window, when you feel it is too stuffy in the room.

Start reading books or take indoor activities so that can help you to divert your mind, also it is time to meet your old friends.

YOUR PARTNER’S ROLE

The most important way you can help your partner through this period, is to be very supportive and understanding.

If she had mood swings, not sleeping properly etc., talk to her just like you, as she is probably very confused about what is happening to her life, her body and her mind.

Remember this is the time for transition for both of you and it takes lot of patience and good communication.

A man should understand what is happening to his life partner and asses as to how he can be of help?  Educate yourself on the process of menopause, both physical and emotional, that will help you to understand that she is going through a difficult phase of her life.

She is growing up, leaving her childhood behind and moving into her second adulthood.

MAMA

PROUD GRAND PARENTS

This blog is dedicated to our grand child  Dron

The experience of being a grandparent is unique for everyone.  Each person brings their unique self to the experience of grand parenting.

Grand parents are the family’s greatest treasure, the founder of loving, keepers of traditions that linger on in our cherished memory. Their special love and the caring is the happiness of our lives. Grandparents keep a family well being close to their hearts.

After becoming grand parents the meaning of parenthood changes and more softness comes within for the grandchild as compared to your own children.

Grand parenting style includes culture, ethnicity, gender, tradition, family structure and a personal history. The bond between both these generations is of pure love and affection On the part of a grandparent it also requires a lot of patience, courage and dedication to rear a second family.

The grand parents are the greatest story tellers, share the stories of the past, their stories may be about the relatives, important events, family tradition, or about their own childhood or the grand child’s parent childhood stories. As the stories of the family are passed on, the grand child will gain a positive image and their place with in the family. Grand parents they serves as an encouragement and support to the family. Grand mentor by teaching and Sharing their skills and talents providing an advice and listening to their grand children. As a role model grand parents provide grand children with example of being a good children and the family loyalty.

Many grand parents thrill at the opportunity to be a playmate with their grand children.  They speak with enthusiasm of time spent, on reading story books, playing games, sharing mutual interests with their grand children. Expressing   love, affection and encouragement words is easy for most of the People.

So grand parents should begin to form a close & loving relation right from the start, the hugs and kisses are appreciable and accepted by children of all ages.

Grand children brings the love, energy, optimism, laughter, activity, youthfulness and purpose to lives of grand parents; at the same  time  grand  parents  provide  them  maturity, knowledge, stability and unconditional love to  the lives of their  grand  children.

When kids are raised in the company of grand parents, they feel comfortable to show their love and learn to express their feelings.

Modern   kids have lot on their plates and are often pulled in many directions at once, but grand parents can guide a lot for the development of a strong character in their grand children. Children have different type of bond with their grand parents than they do with their parents.

They feel comfortable to seek advice with the grand parent. Smart grand parent will make an effort to trusting bond with their kids and make it clear they are available to offer a kind ear and strong shoulders whenever their grand children need them.

Grand parents must be sure and take cautions, when giving advice however since it is never acceptable to go against the wishes of children’s parents.

Think of the environment of your own grand parents, the positive or negative children take time to develop their relationship with their grand parents.

MAMA

Perfect love sometimes does not come, until the arrival of first grand child.
  J

ETIQUETTE ON DINNING

Good table manners are essential as they ensure that both the guests as well as the hosts are comfortable at the table. Displaying good table manners shows a respect for your fellow dinners.

Setting up of a Menu prior to the dinner, taking into consideration the likes & dislikes of the Guests, is essential for the hosts to consider at the planning stage.

Basic rules:

Ø  Sit up straight and keep your elbows off the table, however, it is permissible to rest your wrist on the edge, between the courses.

Ø  As soon as you are seated, place your dinner napkin on your lap. At the end of the meal, place your soiled napkin next to your plate neatly.

Ø  Meals that are served on the platter should be passed on from the right hand side.

Ø  Never eat with your mouth open or try to talk with the food in your mouth.

Ø  Take a small bite so that you can swallow your food easily and maintain a pleasant dinner conversation.

Ø  If the soup is served, dip your spoon into the bowl and then eat it, don’t slurp loudly! 

Ø  If the bread is served as a loaf, tear it with hands, into a small size.

Ø  When eating a salad, be sure to cut the lettuce and other vegetables into a comfortable bite size serving.
Ø  Very few food items should be eaten by with your fingers, e.g.: Indian breads. (If you have doubts, follow the lead or the guests.)

Ø  Never take food from your neighbor’s plate.

Ø  Don’t reach over someone’s plate for something; ask for the item to be passed.

Ø  Never lick or put your knife into your mouth.

Ø  Always say thank you when you are served something, it shows appreciation.

Ø  When you have finished eating, and let others know that you have by placing the knife and fork together with the pongs on the fork facing upwards on your plate.
Ø  It is considered polite to take along a small gift to your host: Flowers, chocolates or Champaign are always appreciated.

Setting up of Dinner Table:

For a proper table setting, the cutlery should be placed around the table.

Bread butter with butter knife (top left of dinner plate).

      Water glass, Wine glass, Liquor glass (top right of dinner plate).

      Both the forks are to be placed left of the plate (Salad fork and dinner fork).

      The dinner knife is placed on the right side.

      Dinner plate with soup bowl on it.

      Dessert spoon  on the top side of the plate. 

      Spoons should be placed to the right side of the knife.

Napkin placement depends on your preference and there are many folding       variations. Fold napkin and set to the left of the fork or place it on the plate.

For setting of a dinner table, expensive tableware is not need. Proper arrangements and creativity is the key to a pretty table setting.

v  Determine how many people will be attending.

v  Cover the table with a table cloth and set placemats in front of each plate. 

v  Each piece of the dinner plate should be placed one or two inches at the bottom of table edge.

v  Place glassware at each place setting depending on the beverages you will be serving

v  Place salt and pepper within the reach of several guests

v  Set flowers on the centre of the table and candles if desired.

“A guest never forgets the host who had treated him kindly.”

Mama